Tokens of Resistance

Research output: Contribution to conferencePaperpeer-review

Abstract

This work discusses a collection of embroidered ‘mother-love tokens’ - lace-edged handkerchiefs featuring hand-stitched representations of gifts given to me by my four daughters when they were small. They include a homemade bracelet made from children’s beads, a teddy bear pin, a picture, and a ceramic heart. I will also stitch an item given to my own mother, and a new item made for my granddaughter as hope for the future. Each object I have chosen is without monetary value, rather it is treasured for the value it holds as a token of love between child and mother. Inspired by the history of love tokens (Millmore, 2015), the cloth tokens left by mothers at the Foundling Hospital in London (1739 – 1955) and the complex history of handkerchiefs as token of memory and endearment (Mirabella, 2011), each artwork reaffirms our bond.

The creation of each stitched token is an act of embodied healing and resistance against the blame and shame have been constant shadows in my mothering experience; on becoming a mother, being mothered myself, and more recently through the painful transition into new mothering relationships as my children have become adults. As a practice-based researcher and autoethnographer, I create these artworks as a method of making to know these experiences inwardly (Marr, 2019, 2021), whilst outwardly enticing change (Adams, Holman and Jones, 2015) and challenging the oppression of mothers.

Society’s expectations of mothers have never been so extreme, with trends towards perfectionism masking patriarchal and misogynistic constructs that hold us answerable for every element of our children’s lives, often well into adulthood. This pressure to be perfect hurts new mothers too, who struggle under the weight of unachievable goals, whilst old mothers are weighed down with regret. This is not constructive for either one.

These tokens are a reminder of my children’s love for me, an affirmation of mine for them, an apology to my own mother, and an act of resistance against dominant narratives that can lead us to forget that a mother’s love that is always there, even when blame and shame get in the way.
Original languageEnglish
Publication statusPublished - Mar 2024
EventMOM Conference 2024: Threads of Connection–I’m Sorry/Not Sorry: Confronting mother (and other) blame–healing & resistance in contemporary culture and beyond - Heiress Gallery and Museum of Motherhood & Online, St Petersburg, United States
Duration: 22 Mar 202424 Mar 2024
https://jourms.org/artists-schedule-for-mom-conference-2024/

Conference

ConferenceMOM Conference 2024: Threads of Connection–I’m Sorry/Not Sorry
Abbreviated titleMOM Conference 2024
Country/TerritoryUnited States
CitySt Petersburg
Period22/03/2424/03/24
Internet address

Keywords

  • Gender
  • Motherhood
  • Craft

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